I am a SAHM to a 17 months old boy. I have had my share of the corporate world for some 8 years after getting a post graduate degree in computer science engineering from the very prestigious IIT Bombay. I chose to be there for my son all day all night in his formative years. I know soon he will be independent & would probably just come home for having meals! I want to nurture his childhood in the best way I can, I want to be there for him when he experiences his first things (step or drawing or whatever). I have happily let go (not sacrificed) of my career aspirations for few years.
But as any other woman who used to work before having a baby, I have days of self doubt when I see other women managing work & baby nicely. Grass suddenly becomes greener on the other side! I admire them for their superwoman capabilities. And then for some time, I convince myself that it is my own choice to do what I’m doing and I’m right in my decision. To each her own.
And there are days like these when I feel literally blessed to be a SAHM. My boy is down with loosies for 4 days now. He isn’t eating ANYTHING. Not even water. I thank my stars that I could continue breastfeeding till now because breast milk is the ONLY thing going in his tummy, which is coming out in sometime anyway, but still that is keeping him hydrated. All day I am either comforting him or breast feeding him or cleaning his poopy nappies. Not to forget sleepless nights when he is breast feeding all through the night. If I had been working, I would have stressed out so much, I cannot imagine! Asking for leaves, worrying about half done work in office, worrying about when to join back, what not. I see & feel my husband’s pain who texts/calls me every few hours to know how the little one is doing. At least I can cuddle up my son, soothe him, pacify him, he knows mumma is there for him always. It goes a long way in forming his emotional quotient. Days like these help me reinforce belief in my decision to be a SAHM.
I wonder in awe how working moms handle such days! Hats off to their strength. Are you a working mom or SAHM? Do you also see the green grass on the other side at times? Do share your feelings.